I'm on a flight to China right now, and long break after a levels is almost over. During this period I have a ton lot of things in the marketing world. Let's start with the working world itself which I'm pretty disgusted with. I am lucky to be a son of the director, or not I would have a harder time coping with this work although this not exactly what I want. I wanted a chance to prove my worth to prove myself to destroy all the doubts I have on myself. I want to challenge myself. However to satisfy my dad I did what is best. The working work itself is dirty and not as pressuring and stressful as I thought it will be. Maybe this only applies in Indonesia, the boss is actually the one to be afraid lose the workers I guess this happen due to the lack of quality manpower. Never in my mind that I once think a marketing scolding the gm and threatening the gm they do not want to work and the gm lost out. A marketing job is to promote the item you are selling while a commission is suppose to be an extra incentive for you to sell the item. Although this strategy has paid off by producing hardworking motivated sales but it created a money oriented environment where without money one wouldn't work to promote the item you are selling. I guess a lack of sense of belonging is a factor contributing to this environment which of course created more problems later on. The greed of money takes over sooner or later, people start snatching customers and creating  fake story or simply bushiting just because of jealousy and greed caused by money itself. This snatching of the customers of course created a loss for the company as each marketing starts slamming price and thus causing a loss in profit to the company (although the loss of profit is kept minimum by the standard pricing).  In the future of course I do hope to find a solution to all this problem. During this working period I also saw the lack of integrity in the business world while businessman themselves are looking for integrity in their partners and workers. So far in my work I have tried my best to be honest at all cost although my dad has told me not to I refused to and shall learn from my mistake and grow from there, I want to be me doing things in my way. I'm still young I still have time to make mistake and learn. 

Despite the amount of money I earned during this time I do still feel some unhappiness inside me I felt that something is missing. I also have lost friends that I used to be able to share all my thoughts to because people do change I do too we meet new people better one or i should say the one that fit us more. A part of me couldn't wait for schools to start and meet new friends how a large chunk of me am afraid of the university life as it means I'm. Closer to the dark Woking life that I have a glimpse at. I'm also afraid of meeting new people and how people will judge me I am never confident in making friends or meeting strangers unless at work. However time will tell and we can't escape it and should enjoy whatever that comes to our way. 

The last point that came to mind is people's attitude, we are human however attitude and work ethic and of course luck. Two person given the same set of instruction could produce different results . nearing a deadline some workers may choose to be depressed and sit down all day being sad while others may choose to use the remaining time to work their ass off to save their job or project. This type of mentality is the difference maker in life. This is the type of people that do not say sorry only but bother to make a change and prove their worth or at least put an effort to change rather than saying sorry from. Time to time. However I realised this skill of talking or bootlicking have brought many far in life as people wants and needs to feel good and loves to be praised. 

Another point that I don't understand is people who spends not within their mean. It's absurd to be spending people's money. In the case of emergency it maybe understandable however borrowing to shop or treat friends that's plain stupid. And people who are not well off spending on things that is not a must in life why can't people save and invest or just fucking save for emergency. While many of the one that's well off are saving. It's still question I'm seeking for answer in the future. I think that's all for now I hope I enjoy my vacation.